When I think about what it means to be a Switch, there are two possibilities that present themselves. The first and perhaps most incorrect in usage is the Grey Switch. These are people that take various aspects of their life and mix them together. At work, they might be a supervisor of dozens of people and therefor take on a Dominant persona. While in the bedroom however, they might be submissive to their lover. To them, taking in the whole of their being like this would make them a Switch because they are not an absolute, they are a shade of grey.
This isn’t what it really means to be a Switch and doesn’t apply to relationships because it doesn’t matter how you are at work or with friends. If you are submissive in the bedroom, you are a submissive. A Switch is a person that is as adaptable to circumstance, their will and the desires of others. When I say others, I also mean other Switches. Switches desire to be with those like themselves that can bend to their moods and not be stuck in the rigid conformity of being a Dominant or submissive all the time.
Nothing is better than to see your beloved one day and be overtaken by your lust for her. To literally sweep her off her feet and take her to the bedroom while she gives in to that fire burning inside you. But then the next day, or even the next hour, to have her grab you by the wrist and lead you to where she wants to go and when she says sit, you sit. If she says lick, you beg to know where to start. I feel that to be a Switch is far more difficult than being a Dominant or submissive just because you have to be fully aware of what you want and what your lover wants at the same time.
There is of course a lot of responsibility laid upon a Switch in a relationship. No one is perfectly balanced, all lean toward being Dominant or submissive. It’s imperative to work on your weakness. If you are a man that is a Switch but leans submissive, you have to be aware that your partner needs you to find the part of you that is Dominant. Not only that but you have to discover that part of you and be comfortable with it. Nothing is sadder than someone trying to be something they are not for someone else. Sure it can be romantic in a sense but in the long run, neither person is going to be happy.
So to all the Switches out there, you are not alone in a world full of Dominants and submissives. In fact, I would say there are more of us out there than you even realize.